The T.O.C Talk Podcast with Dr. Dwan Bryant

Treat Others How You Want to Be Treated

Dr. Dwan Bryant

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The TOC Talk: Table of Confidence

Episode Title: The Likeability Factor: Learning to Like Yourself First
Hosted by: Dr. Dwan Bryant, Psychologist | Author | Recovering Perfectionist

Episode Summary:

In this raw and powerful episode, Dr. Dwan Bryant pulls back the curtain on one of her most vulnerable leadership moments battling an eating disorder while leading a team and showing up like everything was fine.

We often talk about the pressure to be liked in leadership spaces—but what if the real challenge is liking yourself?

Dr. Dwan explores how self-rejection, performative leadership, and chasing applause can slowly unravel even the strongest women from the inside out. Through the lens of the REWIRED model...specifically the Reflection element...this episode invites high-achieving women to stop pretending and start healing.

In This Episode:

  • The hidden cost of being a likable leader
  • A personal story of burnout, breakdown, and breakthrough
  • How the Likeability Factor masks internal rejection
  • Psychological insight into self-concept clarity and leadership
  • The power of reflection, therapy, and spiritual reconnection
  • Practical ways to lead with presence—not performance

Key Takeaways:

  • You can’t lead others well if you haven’t learned to lead yourself.
  • Leadership that lasts starts with internal alignment, not external applause.
  • You can only serve others to the extent you’ve served yourself.
  • Self-liking is not arrogance. It’s wholeness.

Reflection Prompt:

Ask yourself:

“Where in my life am I performing for approval I don’t even need?”
 “When was the last time I looked in the mirror and said, ‘I like you’?”

Scripture:

“Love your neighbor as yourself.” – Mark 12:31
What if the way you treat others is limited by how you treat yourself?

REWIRED Focus: R — Reflection

Stop avoiding the mirror. Start asking better questions:

  • Where did I learn that perfection = worth?
  • Who told me I needed to be liked to belong?
  • What parts of me have I abandoned in the name of success?

Tools for Your Journey:

  • Therapy is not a weakness, it’s a tool for growth.
  • Self-talk matters: Speak life to the woman in the mirror.
  • Try journaling with the REWIRED prompts at dbryantenterprises.com

Quote of the Episode:

“That version of you—the one who’s bold, brilliant, unfiltered, and free—
 She’s not gone.
 She’s just buried under old expectations, waiting for you to stop editing and start embracing.”

Call to Action:

  • Subscribe to The TOC Talk wherever you listen.
  • Share this episode with a sister who’s leading hard but forgetting herself.
  • Visit dbryantenterprises.com to join the REWIRED community and get leadership tools grounded in psychological and spiritual well-being.

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1 Peter 4:10 - "Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God's grace in its various forms." (NIV)